BY TESSA KERRICH – WALKER
My dad is a Zimbabwean man. One of my best friends in the entire world is a Zimbabwean man. I thought Zim men were great. Sadly, they are not (yes, generalising I know). But I feel justified in doing so. I found and read an article headlined: “BYO man beats up bikini wife“. (What’s a bikini wife? Is there a one-piece wife too? And a tankini wife?). The responses are predominantly patriarchally misogynistic. That description has far too many syllables but I meant every one.
This is the run down to the article in case you’re too lazy to read it: Wife wears bikini. Wife wanders outside into her own yard complete with one ”very tall brick wall” and lies down. Useless parents’ boys climb trees and walls to look at her. Her husband (Vincent Shoko) returns and beats her for “basking in the glory of being a spectacle” – for showing off her body to anyone other than himself. Woman relocates to her parents’ house.
What the “H”? This is horrible. Nevermind the story, it’s the responses that I’m even more concerned about. Comments ranged from well done Vincent Shoko” (Chingumbe [Kuno]), to “This woman is crazy beyond measure and imagination!!!Why any1 want would to flaunt thier dust filled ass in a high density surburb is beyond me!!Mr Shoko well done…. ” (Khandelibi [Khalanyoni]). And he can’t spell either, sis. How does he know her ass had dust in (IN?) it? Was he one of the lascivious teenage miscreants sneaking a peek? And why did her ass have dust in it? I think Khandelibi must have some strange ideas about how to make a poo. Try a toilet next time Sir.
Ok, so there are a handful of vincent-you’re-acting-like-a-neanderthal comments (which I think are completely spot on) and I laud Fafidho (England), Frank K (Cape Town) and Xolani (Brighton, UK).
Ha. And look. Point (mine) proven. I know all the locations of all three anti-neanderthilia authors: England, Brighton, and Cape Town. And know neither Kuno nor Khalanyoni (I now know they’re both Zim towns). Therefore it must be a Zimbabwean thing. The neanderthals live in Zim and beat women who have had their privacy invaded.
Ok – I’m generalising. But I chose those five comments based on content, and look at the corresponding geographical correlation. For many things’ sakes, she was in her own yard — not naked (which should be her choice in her own yard anyway), and boys were spying on her. She didn’t tempt them, call them over, or post an advertisement. A parent of one of the boys had this to say, “Boys will be boys and Mrs Shoko should have been more careful”. That parent sanctions their teenage son being a perverted, peeping Tom. Bad parenting. Bad attitude. Female attitude – the parent was a mother – even women participate in their own oppression. Don’t women deserve more than this? “Boys will be boys” – what crap; does that mean in order for Zim boys to be ‘real’ boys they have to conform to the patriarchal standards of misogyny valued by their fathers (and some mothers)? I’m glad I’m in SA where I can tan in my yard and no-one beats me up
